WHEN THE BAGGAGE OF THE WORLD GETS TOO HEAVY
Many align themselves with the struggles of “the empath”. This is a tricky area to talk about because my beliefs do not align with those I typically come across. Whatever it is you believe is okay and it is also okay if what I believe is different. My perspective is one of empowerment and not of the victim. I believe we all are powerful. The choice to believe that we are is all the prevents us from harnessing our strength.
Sometimes the world we experience becomes so heavy, especially if the people we interact with require a little extra energy or support. Most of the time if we care for people, we want to help them, so we give of ourselves – sometimes more than we should. This is where we begin to run into issues of energetic imbalances. Emotion is one of the easiest ways for this to occur.
We sympathize with people and then we take it a little further. We begin to feel what it’s like for them and we want to make it better. This is a beautiful thing if done in a balanced way, but when the scales tip this becomes a situation where one lowers the frequency of another. I feel this is usually done unintentionally. Most people don’t even believe it’s a thing, so they aren’t doing it completely on purpose. I promise it’s a real thing.
So, what do we do when we encounter this problem?
What if we recognize that our frequency is becoming lowered by the troubles of someone else? What if we care for the person? This is where we have the most conflict I have found. It is not so hard to shield out or cut cords with the people who don’t really matter all that much to us. The people we care for can become a burden and we sometimes feel like we are stuck supporting them. Resentment builds and everything just spirals out of control. When this happens, it is good to remember we have more than one clair-sense. When we want to help, but we can’t allow the troubles of others to become our own; we must remember we have options. Clairempathy is not our only sense that allows us to perceive information on an energetic level.
In these moments, we can shut it all down and refuse to allow the person in question to interfere with our energy or well-being. We can also understand where they are and how they feel but decide that is not our heavy and we do not have to carry it. We can choose which of those two options is best for us. Do we want to try to help? Has the person asked for help? How best can you react and remain in alignment with who you are? This last question is the key for me. When I won’t allow someone else’s heavy to weigh me down, I try to find the path to resolution. For me, I want to help. I do not want anyone stuck in their own personal void. I always choose to help. This usually means I do not side with them. I do not tell them what they want to hear. I try to highlight the available paths to clarity and healing for them and I remain there. I can tell you; most people do not like when I do this. However, I will not contribute to the hurting, and I won’t help prolong it by pretending there is no potential for overcoming it. I will not swim in the troubles of another without providing a way out. I also will not allow the situation to interfere with my own well-being because I am my first responsibility.
This does not mean I am not an “empath”; it does not mean I can’t feel exactly what people are experiencing; it means I see it, I recognize it, and I also know it is not mine. We all have pain; we all have struggles; the best way to handle them is never really going to be to wallow in them. This is hard. It is really hard. Finding acceptance is key. This sounds cold but if we apply logic, we see that any other response will only create more pain. If the person suffering gets anything more than recognition of their pain, they then will lower your frequency – even if it is temporary. If you tell them what they want to hear, it only prolongs the amount of time they dwell in that certain frequency, and it also lowers your frequency. Both of these are not good options for me.
We have to realize that we can’t help someone if we put ourselves in the thick of the issue.
If we dive into the turmoil, it becomes very difficult to help anyone, including ourselves. If remain above the problem but still involved, we can more effectively assist the issue without endangering our own self.
After recognition of emotion through clairempathy, I bring my focus to the mind and throat. This is not the time to focus on the heart chakra and the clair-sense that is tied to it. It is time to bring our consciousness to the mind and throat- the places for logic and truth. We can see the paths available if we are willing to look for them. We can find resolution through the other clair-senses and our own clear thinking. This is one way we use those “empath” skills; by blending them with the other senses helping us to understand someone’s journey, but also knowing it is not our journey. To find objectivity so the person in turmoil can find their own way out of their chaos. This is the gift of the clair-senses. Belief is really the first major step in applying this practice.
If you are having trouble finding your own way to apply this practice,
the following is an outline that may be helpful.
Learn To Assess Your Energy
If you want to be able to recognize when your energy is being interfered with, you must practice noticing what your energy feels like in different situations. Spend a week or two really making mental notes of how you feel – physically, mentally, emotionally, and energetically, during different scenarios. When you know how you feel when at your strongest, you will recognize when something tries to shift your frequency.
This does not require any training. I say that having gotten training and I tell you, we all inherently know how to do this. I do not believe it takes long rituals, but they can be helpful and pleasant. There is no wrong way, if it feels like it helped, it likely helped. An easy place to begin is YouTube. They have countless “guided meditations” for chakra and energy healing. Pick one you like and start there. Do not feel like you must adhere to it exactly. You can alter these methods to what feels right to you. Trust yourself, you know the way – but always be willing to embrace new information. I have written a little bit about my thoughts on healing here.
I feel there is always room for improvement, but I do say master as in gaining the confidence to know you are successful. Again, many methods here for this practice. I will link a previous post on my perspective here.
Know How Far You Are Willing To Go.
When you interact with others, be sure you know your boundaries. Do not cross them. Know how far you can walk down the road of someone’s troubles. Embrace someone else’s baggage without it lowering your frequency past your “best” energy. Engage and understand but then when you approach that lowering of energy, it is time to re-shield and cut cords. This takes only moments if you practice when you don’t need it. So, practice cutting cords every night and this will become easy peasy in no time. When you shield this time, make it clear, no one gets to take your energy and you are not giving it freely.
Bring Your Focus Higher
Now is the time to really focus on the mind. This can also be helpful to practice during mediations each night for only a few moments. It is not difficult and again does not require special certificates or training. Just practice. It is like this; if you stub your toe you bring all your attention to that place on your body. Yes, the pain helps do that but what if you can’t make a scene about that toe? What if you must disguise that pain? You then will focus on anything else right? You don’t lean into the pain and focus on it – you bring your consciousness elsewhere. We all do this, we all know how. It is like breathing, we just do it. Being mindful of it just takes a bit of practice. Our attention is on our heart or emotions, so we must bring it to our mind. If we focus on the area right in front of our physical forehead, our consciousness will be there as well. As you listen to your person tell you their troubles, keep your consciousness in this area, and focus on how they might best find their way out of their situation. This does not mean we must give unsolicited advice. Try to formulate your responses in a way that shows you care that their troubles are very real; but also that you see they have the power to fix their troubles. There is no law that says you must match the frequency of those you care for.
Other people’s healing and harmony is not your responsibility.
Again, this is not usually well received at first, but know that having a friend who always helps to empower you instead of wallow with you is one of the greatest gifts we can ever hope for. At the end of the day, no matter how much you love someone, you can’t fix their problems and you can’t heal for them. All we can do is have faith in them, lend clarity when we can, and strength when it is asked for. If we try to take on the burdens of others, all that happens is the heavy gets heavier and more people carry it. We all have a responsibility to manage our own selves. We all are capable of harnessing our own strength – if only we have the will to believe it.
Refusing to lower your frequency does not take away your “empath” self. It makes you a more centered person who utilizes all of your senses. Someone who isn’t governed by imbalance, but rather someone who harnesses their own true strength. We don’t need to abandon our loved ones. What if instead of lowering ourselves to feel where they are, we work to raise them up above their troubles to where we are. Do not match energy, provide a path to a lighter place. This is a very achievable goal for all people.